Ring ring... Hellooo? Ring ring... Hellooo?

Being an 8-year-old girl, I'm a huge fan of Unicorns. I love 'em. Especially on toast. My theory is that they do actually exist, and the lack of eye witnesses is simply down to the irrestistable urge people get to run up and hug one when they see it. I mean, what's not to love about a large, powerful, skittish animal with a long sharpened stick coming straight out of its head?

Somehow au_riverhorse survived his Unicorn encounter long enough to recreate it in Lego...



Now apparently this particular specimen was noted for its total lack of goaty beard and unusual wish-granting abilities. So I checked the definitive reference on Unicornology to see if I could identify the species...



Due to the lack of fur coloration, I was able to immediately eliminate Unicornus Stultus Valdissimus (Excessively Stupid Unicorn), the white pelt being more indicative of Unicornus Renis Furtivus (Stolen Kidney-ed Unicorn). But the lack of scar tissue, un-placable accent or television set puts doubt on that classification too, leaving only one possible conclusion: what we have here is the extremely rare Unicornus Culus Arcorum (Butt Full of Rainbows Unicorn)!



According to my texts, the magical effects of this particular species are in fact (a) an inability to correctly spell the word Unicron, (b) an inexplicable urge to use Photoshop, and (c) an inability to distinguish discarded candy from discarded feces, with hilarious consequences probably.